Okay, I get it now. God is bigger than my illness, bigger than my anger and frustration, bigger than money troubles, bigger than, well anything. I have been honest about my feelings, questions, worry, doubt the whole time during this journey. Just when I would begin to lose hope God would show up. I admit that alot of where He has shown Himself has to do with finances. In all honesty though that has been one of my biggest issues and fears. That's just the way life is. This life is difficult to navigate when you are struggling in the financial department. Time and time again as we have tried to deal with the storm of this illness we have been hit hard financially and time and time again the phone rings, the mail comes, a text message comes through and someone is throwing us a life preserver. This time the mail came and some long time friends, more like extended family, from across the country stepped in to help out. We haven't even talked on the phone during all of this, and yet being the amazing, loving people they are they pulled together as a family and blessed us during this Christmas season. Your thank you card is coming but in case you read this before it gets their...THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts. We love you guys even though we are so far away from each other.
So I can't promise that I will never slip back and let the evil one convince me things are hopeless for a little while. I know though that I am praising God for all of His blessings and asking Him to always be right there to turn me back around. I don't need to know what the future holds. I just need to remember it is in God's hands and His plans are far better than anything I could imagine.
Thank you God for showing us that You have never left us alone in this and You never will. You have used ordinary people as amazing blessings in our life. We are so thankful for You and for them. Continue to use this struggle for Your good and never let us lose hope. Help us to stop telling You how big our problems are and to start telling our problems how BIG You are.